So, here's one of my favorite Sadie memories. Sadie was very floppy at birth. She had no tone and was like jello. It was difficult to nurse her and I had to carry her like a football because if I held her on my shoulder she would slump down and fall.
When she was 10 weeks old I was in the nursing room with 5 other mothers who gave birth within 6 weeks of Sadie. She was the oldest, smallest and most fragile. I remember trying to get her in a good position to nurse, looking around, and noticing all the strong healthy babies getting a snack. They were cooing, smiling, pulling up their heads- and there was Sadie- floppy, limp and little eye contact. This was probably one of the hardest moments and the moment I realized Sadie would never be the same as other "typical" children. How could she? She was already so many steps behind all these newborns.
It was necessary to me to wake Sadie every few hours for feedings. She had short endurance therefore she ate less more often. All day I thought if only she would smile at me, then I would know she's in there. During her 2 am feeding I remember very clearly I looked down pulled her close to my face and whispered, "I love you Sadie". At that very moment, when I thought I couldn't take it one more day, she smiled. It was the sweetest biggest smile ever. I knew without a doubt that Heavenly Father loved me and loved this sweet little girl he sent to our family.
Sadie hasn't stopped smiling since. She has the sweetest, most beautiful little spirit. It's funny, but it is really hard to see that she is any different than any other child behind that smile.
1 comment:
What a beautiful story- made me all teary.
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